I've got these shakes and bad breath

After a long weekend of drinkin' and hangin I'm exhausted to say the least. Which also explains why I haven't blogged in a while. By the time I work up the idea to even touch the keyboard, I'm seein' double and back out like a drunken hook up with a butter face.

Friday...let's see, the memory is a little hazy. Ah yes. Went to my old guitarist and good friend Nick's house for his Girlfriend's birthday bash. Love those guys. Met some new people, shot the shit. It was a good time. Surprisingly enough, I survived long enough to be one of the last to pass out. I'm usually one of the first. It's like if I were in a horror movie, I would be one of the first to go. Not because I'm dumb and walk into the trouble either. I would be the one dying of a freak accident...Or taken hostage and killed. Weird comparison, I know, but lately, I've been out early. Anywho, I'm going off subject. I woke up around 11:00am. The house felt like a rocking boat and the sun hurt my retinas. I had Josh drive us back up north. We made it only to Blaine before I had to take over the wheel. I stopped and got some BK Lounge and as we're driving, Josh has to puke. Thank god I had a bag (from BK) for him to puke in and thank god he just ate skittles. I've always wondered what the smell of rainbow mixed with bile was. And scratch that from the list of things I want to experience in life.

Saturday. I went to Tony's and hung out with the gang. Highlight of that night = Brandon's stomach waxing. I hurt just from watching. Other than that, it was a pretty tame night due to the childrens being home.

Sunday. I get home in the evening. Take a shower, and off to drink again. Alisha picks me up at my flat. We go to a friend's going away party because he signed his life away to the man. Uncle Sam is really not a great family member. When was the last time he remembered your birthday? Oh yeah, when you turn 18 and are forced to sign a draft card. Happy birthday adult tax paying citizen. When we to sacrifice humans, we'll give you a call! Sweet. $5.00 cup of all you can drink vodka mixes, beers and UV Blue. Needless to say, I was drunk within the first hour of arrival. Not a whole lot of people showed up and the keg was killed by 1:00am. It was epically stellgnar to say the least. I hurt myself somehow because it hurt to be alive the next day. I played horseshoes and sucked at it, but hey, when it takes one hour to not even hit 10 points, then I would call that a drunken bucket of fun. This was in the dark too. I got a ringer like Ray Charles. Good friends showed up though. Played on the guitar for a bit, and got a ride home from my brother's friend. I was still drunk when I went to work on Monday. Oh yeah, and I kicked some ace at beer pong. Love that game

Monday, nothing happened. Tuesday, nothing happened (great times eh?) Wednesday, finally met a down to earth person who is willing to play drums for The Addison. I've seen soooooooooo many responses of flakes and dicks who are 50 years old and wanna jam on some Slayer. Speaking of Slayer, when has it EVER been cool to try grow some long hair and try to be a Satanist? You know damn well, they are doing yoga backstage, sipping on wine coolers and catching the TIVO of the current Oprah that they missed because they were too busy curling their hair. Anyway, this dude is pretty rad. We just had some beers and talked about plenty of other topics besides just music. He also has a wide variety and knowledge of music and bands. We're going to have our first practice on either Monday or Tuesday.

I'm going out of town, I'll catch up on Monday probably. I'll miss you internet.

I should have been a cowboy

Surfin' Surfin' U.S.S.R.

And Friday is here. Tonight, I'm going to my good friend's house in Brooklyn Center. It's Steph's Birfday today. She is my Mexicasian friend. I was just thinking today. I've been sober for a week. Today. What the fuck is up with that. I'm going to get drunk and probably annoying really fast tonight, so don't be surprised if I complain about being raped or end up captive in some strange milf's house who breaks my ankles and forbids me to leave.

I've been couch surfing for the last month. I moved out of my old flat on the 2nd of this month. Floors, couches and blow up mattresses seem to be the latest trend. I am also sick of watching "The View" and "Who's the Boss?" all day long. Come to think of it, those two shows, every morning for one week and sober. Talk about a fucking great time. It's almost as fun as being Starr Jones and trying not to eat.

I've been playing in a new band now for roughly half a year. It's really gnar. We tried out a drummer, but he was terrible. And tell me how this works. The dude is really fat. For one, I didn't think drumming + fat = a decent drummer. But he can tear it up alone. When the music starts a playing, the skill flies out the window. Makes me wonder if he is more worried about food than the song. We recently met a new dude. He seems pretty rad. I hope that it works out. So I'm going to take this time to plug the band. We're called, "The Addison" for now anyway. We're at myspace.com/theaddisonmusic

Well kids, I'm gunna cut this short. Got practice, prostitutes and drinkin to do

Wear condoms and screw midgets

Catch up on Monday

<3s and shit

Littering and....

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When It Matters the Most

So welcome to Midwestern Graffiti. What a contradiction in so many ways that I'm even on this website right now. Another thing I must get out there before I forget, Fuck Geek Squad. There...I said it. No need to explain why, but if you really want to know why, just take your computer there. Too many empty promises. It's like getting a cheap hooker with a guarantee that she doesn't have any diseases. Would you buy into it? Didn't think so. Unless you're a desperate dude who only gets action on World of Warcraft.

I'm going to go on a rant about World of Warcraft. Tried it. Yes I did. It was the most life sucking invention ever made. First of all, it's completely unoriginal. The whole thesis of WOW is that it's based off of the late, great J.R.R. Tolkien and his narcotic and hallucinogenic induced creations. Secondly, it's able to suck you in so much that you are ignoring your phone on a Friday night because you don't want to get suckered by your friends into going out somewhere. You got quests to accomplish man, fuck the bar right now. Last, guilds...Guilds are groups made up of so many members. You have to be the coolest nerd to be able to command these groups and taking on the role of "Guildmaster" is some sort of full time job and responsibility. These guilds can really hurt your avatar's feelings by denying you the right to join their little clique. Well fuck 'em. They are just compensating for how little about the female anatomy. "Girls pee out of their butts, right?".

I know a guy. He had to take a week off of work. Yes a week off of work. Why? the newest expansion of WOW and he wanted to level up ten more levels. This person has hardly any friends, he is a guildmaster and he has played this game almost every night for about four years straight.

Moving on. I'm looking to buy a house. There are so many things about the process that you just never hear about. I feel like I'm starting to understand everything that's involved, but still learning. It's like learning a new language. In the same sense, it's like salesmen, just in general, make up their own language. The shitty part about that is this. Anyone, in any given situation, will walk into a opportunity to buy something they really really want. But guess what? You can't afford it. Really? So you settle for something less due to the emotion of passion called impulse. Impulsive behavior is never the way to go, however, we all do it. I don't want to be impulsive with this house buying shiznit.

Before I go, I'll leave you with a list of things that piss me off

1. Teen Moms on MTV

2. BP Oil

3. Trolls

4. Teen Moms on MTV Marathon

5. Nascar

I'll catch you guys later. I'm gunna go pick up some hot piece of blood elf.

Shhhaaaa